"Linda, listen to me… Thank you."


 

Jeeesuuus Christ! What the hell was that! In my four years of ALS, I have never felt this bad. Wait, nevermind, yes I have. I forgot about my disastrous diaphragm pacer surgery that left me with eight weeks of pain resulting in a slight addiction to oxycodone and a good dose of suicidal thoughts. So, being sick for two weeks, doesn’t look so bad in hindsight. But let me tell you, this was a rough two weeks. This monster called ALS was winning. But today is the first day that I felt like I might be the victorious one. So, I’m pretty sure I deserve some sort of reward, medal, key to the city, a prize, or something! I guess I could consider my life my reward because I am… Still here… After a respiratory illness in the fifth year of ALS. Gracie came over yesterday and looked at me like, “You’re still here?”

I will get back to regular blogging tomorrow and yes, the winner of the Christmas tree contest! But, today some thank you’s are in order. Let’s start with all of you… If I could hug each and every one of you and thank each and every one of you for all of your love and all of your prayers I would. Pat yourselves on the back because your prayers worked. Sometimes I watch the news and see so much evil in the world but I remind myself that there are people like all of you praying for a girl in Paris that you have never met. You all have touched my heart and restored my faith in humanity. So, a million thank you’s and a million hugs. I will be schlepping my sick little ass over to my favorite church this weekend and I will light a candle for each and every one of you.

I also have to tell all of you that I read all of your emails and all of your comments. I cannot respond to everyone but I want you to know that each message of love reached me.

There is someone else I need to thank… A very special person. I call her Linda, but her real name is Debbie. Why do I call her Linda? Click HERE. Have you ever had the feeling that nothing in life is by chance. That there is a reason for everything. That God or whoever you pray to, puts people in your life for a reason? That person for me is Debbie. A year ago, I was sitting at a café in Paris and I noticed a woman was sitting next to me writing in her journal…in English. (Yes, I looked.) I don’t know who spoke to whom first but within three minutes I knew we would be friends forever. Here we were, two American girls sitting at a café in Paris who happen to be from the same hometown of Missouri. Debbie went to college in Springfield, Missouri where I grew up and where my entire family is from. Debbie is from St. Louis where I lived when Gracie was young. It was as if Debbie was my long lost sister. We have the same accent, we laugh at the same things, we eat the same food, we raise our children the same, and we both just get each other. Debbie was in Paris watching over her 16-year-old daughter as her daughter was going on casting calls for her modeling career. I just decided to start going with Debbie to wait for her daughter with her. You really get to know somebody at a Parisian café in the freezing cold over 14 glasses of red wine. Over the past year, Debbie would always return to Paris with her daughter and we would always get together. How could I not? She was officially family. So, it was no surprise when Debbie showed up at my door last week because she knew I was sick.

Let me be clear, David and I are not at our best when I am sick. I panic and then David panics and then we both start screaming at each other. There’s a lot of fuck you’s going on at this household in times of stress. Don’t get me wrong, David is the best person you want by your side when you are sick but you also want to rip his fucking head off. And now, Debbie has seen this whole show and surprisingly she neither called social services or the police and I think we are still friends. It takes a real friend to go through your worst moments of life with you and that’s exactly what last week was. You know how at the movies when someone is choking at a restaurant and they are gasping for breath and someone comes a long and does the Heimlich? Well, that’s how my week was, sometimes 4 to 5 times a day. Yesterday, it happened at least 10 times. I would start to choke, David would grab my cough assist machine and Debbie would be on her knees with a tissue wiping my mouth. Gross. Five minutes of complete terror would occur, my coughing would subside, then life would return to normal. Then, one hour later the whole episode would restart. Debbie was by my side for every moment. That’s actually an understatement. Debbie never left my side even for a second. She would stay with me even if I were sleeping. She never once left the apartment…for nine days. Debbie showed up with matching leopard pajamas for us, crawled in my bed, and got me through this. How did she get me through this? Mainly with love but mostly through laughter. I have just spent the last nine days fearing for my life and laughing hysterically. I wish all of you could have a friend like Debbie. I am one lucky girl. Hold on, Debbie gets more impressive. Not only is she gorgeous obviously, but now you know that she is funny and a wonderful caregiver and a true friend but… Here’s the thing… Debbie did all of this while suffering through her own illness. Debbie has MS. You would never know it this week. Debbie pushed her MS aside so that she could help her girlfriend with ALS. I know that Debbie was suffering with her MS but she never told me and she never let me see it. I’m pretty sure she deserves a key to the city as well.

Debbie and I have watched YouTube, watched The Real Housewives, caught up on our social media, watched the past four years of Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, watched every video that Cher has ever done, watched Dr. Zhivago for the first time, and played Crack Trivia sometimes until 1 o’clock in the morning. We ordered take-out, Debbie made homemade chicken noodle soup and we ate four packages of Nestlé’s Tollhouse chocolate chip cookies. I could not have asked for anything better. Debbie anticipated everything I needed including my crazy pills. She took a few herself… This was an extraordinary week so don’t judge.

She also put up with and understood David which is no easy feat. David would scream at both of us for whatever reason and then he would go to the kitchen and make us an apple tart. Every. Single. Day. Debbie would just tell David to shut up and then enjoy a slice of apple tart and three glasses of wine. We laughed, we cried, we gossiped, we solved all the world’s problems and we got through this. So, Debbie, with all of my heart and all of my soul thank you for being my friend. I knew there was a reason God put us together at that Parisian café. You are an angel in disguise.

So, hopefully I can put this respiratory illness behind me and look forward towards Christmas. I am so excited to share the winner of the Christmas tree contest with you tomorrow. In the meantime, check out my Pinterest board HERE that I have put together titled Have Some Decorum Christmas Good Ideas. I think is rather good, if I do say so myself. Thank you all again for all of your support. I cherish all of you… minus a couple of you psychopaths. I have manners so I won’t name names. But on the whole, I love all of you. Now, please take all of your prayers that were directed at me and direct them towards all of the innocent Pakistani schoolchildren that were murdered today by the Taliban. Please pray for their souls and their families and please pray for the retarded people who kill in the name of religion including that idiot in Australia yesterday.

*Something you don’t know about me? I am a fabulous roller skater. When I lived in Missouri, my mother would drop my sister and me and our best friends, Leslie and Emily, off at the rollerskating rink every weekend for hours. It was called Skate Port. We would order nachos with fake dripping cheese, Dr Pepper and my favorite sweet and sour candies and skate and skate and skate. We wore Jordache jeans and feathered our hair and roller skated to the soundtrack of Grease. I’m pretty sure I even had a few birthday parties at this place. I loved it. My parents wouldn’t even stay… They would just drop us off and pick us up at the end of the day. I would never do that in this day and age with Gracie. I would be too scared some creep like Terry Richardson would kidnap her. Creeps like that always hang out at rollerskating rinks. That’s it for today. I hope everyone’s having a happy holiday.

115 comments:

  1. I'm so relieved you're back feeling well and as usual humorous. I'm sure ,like everyone else, I've been checking your blog OC for days. So happy you're doing better. Your friend sounds amazing and David does too, even with all the yelling. Who can blame him with all the stress. Apple tarts are the way to go. Or maybe just the wine...
    It's gloomy and rainy here in northern california but you just made some sunshine for me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. So so happy to read that you came through this with the love of your bestie! Actually sounds like it was mostly good times:) I've been so worried about you!
    Merry Christmas! Is it too late to send a photo of my tree?? I didn't have the heart to send it when you were dealing with this set back.
    Much love,
    Therese

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely send me a picture of your tree! Would love to see it! Thank you for all your kind thoughts. XOXO

      Delete
  3. So wonderful to have you back! I've been thinking of you every day. Team Ellie sounds amazing, if a bit fractious ;-) Victory suits you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh Ellie, I'm so glad to read a new post from you! I'm so thankful the prayers worked and your are feeling better, if anyone could kick that URI to the curb it is you. Your friend Debbie sounds wonderful, just what the Dr. ordered. Thank you for coming back to the Blog, you were missed terribly! I just received your Thanksgiving book yesterday and stayed up reading it last night. I'm going to use the Turkey and Dressing recipe's for Christmas dinner, thank you for sharing!

    My Very Best Regards,

    Jamie...A new follower from Texas

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love that video, I watch it almost every day. My husband is so sick of hearing me say "Linda, honey, listen listen listen", he tells me to shut up and I do it more. I laugh so hard I snort.

    I am so glad that you are feeling better but even more happy to know you have a friend like "Linda". We should all be so lucky.
    Who can spend 9 days taking care of a sick friend this close to Christmas? She is definitely a gem and I wish I knew her.
    Now I am going to you tube to watch Linda listen one more time then I am really going to finish my tree, this time I mean it. Or maybe I will go find an apple cider donut somewhere.
    MB

    ReplyDelete
  6. Omg I have checked like 10000 times! I'm so glad to see this post. And what a lovely post it is.

    ReplyDelete
  7. So happy you are feeling & doing better! I was worried...what a wonderful fried Debbie is! Its good to have people like that in our lives...I sent a pic of my tree to you on twitter :) sending big love xobtw this wss the wk I was supposed to be in Pais :(

    ReplyDelete
  8. So happy to hear you are on the mend. Been watching for word from you daily. I just received your Christmas book - already have the Thanksgiving one - and have been devouring it. Small world that you are from St. Louis. I have been going there my entire 60 years. My husband grew up there - Clayton, DeSmet HS - and my cousins lived in Ladue - St. Joseph and DeSmet. Just so, so happy that you are feeling better. Barbara

    ReplyDelete
  9. So happy to hear you're feeling better. "Debbie" sounds like an angel! You know you're blessed to have her, and now we all do. Thank you "Debbie"!
    Ignore the psycho's or better yet...name names!!
    I'm a new follower and happy to have found your humor, honesty and spirit.

    ReplyDelete
  10. This post made my day! So much so I did what I swore I would never do and that is get a Google account! But I did to show you and God how happy I am that you are back. Sounds like you and "Linda" had a divine appointment from God that day. It's amazingly wonderful how God can intersect our lives with someone to bless us! He has blessed me with your blog. That ALS needs to leave your body and go into a Komodo dragon…are they really useful for anything anyway!

    ReplyDelete
  11. THANK GOD!YOUR BACK...............
    I think I can say; WE all your READERS were VERY concerned.I AM VERY HAPPY to hear that YOU did not go OUTSIDE!As for the yelling and the EMOTIONS........sounds perfectly normal to me!I love your story about how you met Debbie........and the fact you two came from the same place!!!!!!I adore she brought matching PJ's and chocolate chip cookies..............ADORE!
    Welcome BACK...............Now,once a MOTHER always a MOTHER.Please doNOT over do just cause your feeling better!You are the BEST CHRISTMAS GIFT I could EVER receive...........love to YOU!XOXOX

    ReplyDelete
  12. So happy to hear that you got through this with such a priceless sister-friend. I'm forwarding this post to mine. :) I'm so happy you are feeling better!

    ReplyDelete
  13. and she's back!!!!! So thankful to be able to say that!

    ReplyDelete
  14. All I can say is there is a massive sigh of relief!!! And Debbie rocks!!
    Thank goodness you are back!

    ReplyDelete
  15. You have a great friend and a wonderful husband!
    Have a very merry Christmas.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear Ellie,
    Thank goodness you're back and feeling better. I fell in love with you through Janet at The Gardener's Cottage. I think it's true love too. :)
    Love,
    Ellie

    ReplyDelete
  17. So glad you,re back and feeling better!!
    Esther

    ReplyDelete
  18. As truly delighted I am to hear that you are doing better today, I really want to say how sorry I am that you have had such...I would think...terrifying?...moments as of late. We can't know but we are all just sending our love to you nonetheless because of your indomitable spirit. Ellie, I think that the comments to your last post are the most beautiful thing that I have ever seen on the internet. I really do.
    As for David, bah that is just...so French. I honestly think that you would have to live with a Frenchie to know exactly how French it is but it gives me relief to know that I don't have the only wonderful man like that...
    And Debbie? Debbie, I know I am not the only one to thank you from the bottom of my heart but also that you need no thanking either. The beauty of true friendship is up there amongst the very Best in Life.
    And finally, the video? Whew. I will come back to that one whenever needed, merci.
    Of course I am right there with the lovely La Contessa. Even if I am not a Mom, I worry like one and hope that you will take it in the best way when I say "piano, piano" or "slowly, slowly". Please.
    So much Love to you,
    Heather
    PS. We have our tree after my doggedly telling Remi, "No, it is NOT too early" but it only has its lights on for now (ONE strand artfully spread out as all the rest are bright blue LEDs or that lasso style) but I will definitely send a photo once it is done! :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. I thought the title of the blog today was gonna be about me but I knew I hadn't done anything but prayed for you. Phew..glad you are better. I knew you were special when I was driving you around in Malibu over 25 yrs ago.
    I miss and love you and happy you will be around to celebrate another Christmas!
    Love Linda in the Bu!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Happy, happy- she's back!! Like Stephen said, I've checked a million times to see how you're doing. Lucky you for having a gem like Debbie for a friend. Sending love and best wishes from the west coast!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Happy, happy, joy, joy I am so happy to hear you are feeling better!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Okay! I can exhale again.

    We've all missed you. Since my sister "turned" me on to you and your writings ... I am enthralled with your mind and heart and sense of humor and yes, your courage. You give so much to all who read your words. You're a giver and we are so much better off in our own lives reading your thoughts and observations. God bless you, as I truly believe He does.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76RrdwElnTU

    ReplyDelete
  23. Ellie! You're back! Woo hoo!!! Like all of your vast legion of fans, I've been checking back several times a day to make sure that you were ok. It sounds like you and your fabulous friend Debbie have the makings of a really great reality show ;) ...move over Housewives and Kardashians! SO HAPPY to know you're ok.
    XO / Nancy

    ReplyDelete
  24. You have been in my thoughts and prayers every day and I am so very HAPPY that God was listening to all of us! Enjoy your tree enjoy your family and how extremely BLESSED you are to have the most kick ass BFF! It is live like that that works miracles ! So very grateful to read your post it is a GOOD day 😍
    Xo
    Nathalie

    ReplyDelete
  25. Psychopath checking in. Thank you Debbie. Glad you're feeling better, Ellie -- how rude of you to deprive the world of your snotty bitchiness for more than a couple of days. I was actually forced to read other blogs in my reader, and listen to my boss' complaining about how his winter tan is not keeping up. I guess this is his hint that I need to get him some tanning gift certificates for Christmas, although I suspect he has a life membership at the tanning bed place.

    ReplyDelete
  26. OMG, have been looking for your blog several times a day, so very worried about you! Thank God you have a friend like Debbie to get you through this illness.
    We love you Ellie and praying for you.

    ReplyDelete
  27. thrilled you are back and firing on all cylinders again! x

    ReplyDelete
  28. So happy to see you! I have been checking your blog ten times a day since your last post! So wondeful that you have a friend like Debbie, she sounds amazing. I get so touched reading your blog and your really put words on so many feelings and thoughts. I have a neurological disease too and has lost most of my physical strength so I am in a wheelchair too. Started laughing out loud when I read about you and your husband´s reactions to each other in a situation like this. It is exactly the same with me and my husband. He panics, I panic and we yell at each other until the roof lifts. My best friend and biggest support but in these situations ...gahhh..... All my warmest thoughts and love to you!

    ReplyDelete
  29. So so so happy that you are feeling better! You have so many people that love you here in SB, you should easily get a key! We are here rooting for you and sending you love every day!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Thank God you are feeling better! I was so worried and checking several times a day!

    ReplyDelete
  31. HALLELUJAH.....Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah! Stay well and don't overdo....I know that sounds bossy....xo

    ReplyDelete
  32. So pleased to see you're on the up-swing!

    ReplyDelete
  33. like everyone, i'm so happy you are back. we all need a friend like linda, linda, linda. leopard pj's? amazing. love that so much. x

    ReplyDelete
  34. So delighted to see your post, and even more delighted that you're feeling better, Ellie. Sounds like your friend is your angel, and that you are hers in return. Keep up the cussing... makes my day

    ReplyDelete
  35. Ellie!!!! I have Cuban candles lighted up for you...checking and praying and checking again. You have created this "cult" around the world...do you realize that? I was decorating the house, like countless Christmas before, but this year I wanted the result to be even more special so I could take pictures and send them to you. Now that prayers have been answered and you are back...with a very happy heart I shall submit to you. Even if im late for the contest. You are a light that makes all of our Christmas this year even more special. I thank the Lord with all my heart that you are well and surrounded by so much love and true friends.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Thank goodness...I've been checking hourly! What a good friend and person "Linda" is to see you through this illness. Don't overdo the Christmas festivities but be merry and bright.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Ellie,
    I'm so happy you're back! I checked in daily, holding my breath, as you were fighting for yours. (Somehow I thought that would help - just my usual 'magical thinking' - but maybe it did!)
    Your friend Linda/Debbie is a treasure.
    xoxo
    Joanne

    ReplyDelete
  38. Linda, honey, just listen to me!!!! That post was so UNFAIR!!! As I was being wheeled through O'Hare in my double wide wheelchair (thanks for alerting American Airlines about the serious growth in my butt) I started reading your blog. The flood gates opened and four random people approached me and my wheel chair handler dude asking if I was okay.

    That's the definition of a "party foul"!!! It's not that I mind crying...I'm totally the ugliest cryer EVER. For the record, I HATE all people that look pretty when they cry. It's wrong.

    I wouldn't have been anywhere else on this planet for these last 9 days. I knew Ellie was tough...damn! After this week I'm convinced she can chew glass and spit nails. She's almost Cher...if I could prop her up on a cannon, we'd have to start calling her Cher. Ellie is feisty, stubborn as hell, hysterical, a fighter, beautiful, tender hearted, and as loyal as they come. I believe in answers to prayer. Trust me, the girl fought for every breath of air this past week and survived!!!

    This post wouldn't be complete without awarding David L. Decret Hubby of the Year. He growls however has no bite. He doesn't know it but when he's yelling he has a smirk on his face. Are we supposed to take that serious? He put up with me taking over his side of the bed, drinking all his wine, and stealing his wife for our girl time. He got us take out at all of our favorite restaurants in Paris, made homemade apple tarts daily, and made me the BEST pasta dinner I've ever had!!! Was that all about me? How unusual. For the record his pretty dang fabulous to his gorgeous bride. It melted my heart!!

    LINDA, LISTEN TO ME, JUST LISTEN TO ME!!! I LOVE YOU SO SO SO MUCH!! Thank you God!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Oh how glad I was to see you're back Every morning my David would ask about you. I was pleased to report to him this morning over our cup of tea that you were back on air. Both of us shed a tear. We're coming to terms with the fucking idiot here in Oz who ran a muck in the name of religion. Never thought it would happen in laid-back, easy going Australia. We're all in shock. So your recovery and hearing about your gorgeous girlfriendf renews my faith in human nature. Happy Christmas dear girl. Deidre in Sydney.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Bless you, Debbie - for helping to bring her back to us. Take care, Ellie! I look forward to tuning in on the Christmas tree winner.

    ReplyDelete
  41. So very glad you're feeling better! Happy to have you back, now let the party begin!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Ellie,
    What great news that you are feeling better, and doing well enough to blog with no less than your usual amazing verve and candor! You, David & Grace have been in my thoughts (and worries) over the last two weeks. I’m so glad to hear there were plenty of f-you’s being thrown around, with lots of yelling, and that you had Debbie by your side. I laughed out loud at your description of the whole scenario, though given how sick you were, I hope that doesn’t seem inappropriate. And please forgive me if I’m being really tacky and/or politically incorrect, but I can picture you and Debbie giving The Real Housewives a run for their money, as The Sclerosis Sisters in your matching leopard pj’s - “listen to me, Linda”!
    *Something you don’t know about me - my darling late husband was from St. Louis, was a terrific pairs roller skater, and also was a roller skating car hop back in the day at the Parkmoor. (All before my time - he was much older than me.)
    xoxo, Catherine

    ReplyDelete
  43. We literally (overused much) could not have less in common - lifestyle, knowledge of all things fancy etc. but I'm not sure I enjoy reading any other blog as much as I do yours. You have a great sense of humor and an amazing ability to tell stories. It's such a pleasure to read about your life. So happy you are feeling better!

    ReplyDelete
  44. Dear Ellie, what a wondedful gift to have you back with us. You are one strong woman and I am happy to be your friend. I have waited patiently and prayed for you during this crisis and it made my day to log on and find a message from you. Best wishes to Debbie, who could be a hands-on friend while your faithful readers could only pray and wait. It is truly wonderful that you are feeling better and I hope that tomorrow will find you even stronger.

    ReplyDelete
  45. so happy you are feeling better, I was worried, and checked everyday, so I was so glad to hear from you.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Ellie, I love Debbie already! Give her a kiss for me and tell her she has a new fan
    I am so happy and relieved to have you back, you got enough attention to last for a while so shape up and keep writing!
    Luv u
    Lourdes

    ReplyDelete
  47. Welcome back Ellie!!!! You just made my day :) xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  48. Welcome back! So glad to hear you are better and posting again. Linda is a gift from God. She is a friend like no other. You, too, Ellie, are one special person. I admire your strength, tenacity, and will power. Susan .

    ReplyDelete
  49. Hooray!! Much love to you and loved this post -- now bring on Christmas!!

    ReplyDelete
  50. God bless Debbie...and you! I, too, believe in angels in disguise. There are no coincidences, really. So glad you're feeling better and able to enjoy Christmas! May the "glow" from her visit carry you through...xoxo
    -Susan C.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Oh, I'm so relieved to hear from you! I have worried about you for 2 weeks. In fact when I heard you were sick I'd get up in the middle of the night to check your blog. I was so hopeful for a sign that you were ok. NOW I have one! Thank god! I will continue to pray for you and the children! Take care Ellie and Debbie. XO, Bella (formally my google name which is also my feisty jack Russell's name. I think she's just like you! :)

    ReplyDelete
  52. Thank God you're back! I missed your spirit so much. Happy, merry Xmas.

    Xo,
    Maria

    ReplyDelete
  53. So glad that yu are back.What a wonderful friend you have.Keep safe .

    ReplyDelete
  54. So happy to hear you are feeling better. That sounds absolutely vicious and evil and no one should have to suffer through it. Huge hug!

    ReplyDelete
  55. I have been checking and so happy to read about your recovery.......stay well. I too have a heavy heart as I followed the siege in our beautiful country and saw an innocent mother of three and beautiful young man lose his life and now this........looking for all the beauty and good and your blog is one of these.
    Take care

    ReplyDelete
  56. Dear Ellie,
    I'm so, so happy to read your latest blog entry -- I've been checking your blog many times a day since you started your cold and I'm so glad you made it through -- What a Roller Coaster ride with all those heimlich maneuvers!!! Thank God for Debbie and David with his tarte tatins!

    Love your story about Debbie -- that's really something that you met and you're both from the same town, sounds like kismet, to me -- and love that she was with you constantly -- and with MS, too!

    I love all my friends, but I'm especially grateful for the ones who are health challenged/have been through some intense life changing event, because they have a first hand understanding of loss and the depth that comes with that loss -- especially when they have a sense of humor, (or the ridiculous, more precisely). While going through my divorce I saw a counselor, Marcia, who had advanced kidney disease. The first time I met her she was all tucked into her wing-backed chair with with a crocheted granny square blanket on her lap and a water bottle on her table -- and I thought, "Wow, she's just like me," as I sprawled out on the coach with my coat over my legs, and my water bottle, (I can't talk without a constant supply of water since Sjogren's affects my ability to vocalise -- I lose my voice). Everything Marcia told me was gold: She said, of course I was angry about being ill -- because I loved life so much; and that I shouldn't waste my time being angry with my husband, (who was divorcing me because he was tired of being married to a sick person) because my very limited energy was precious and I needed every bit of it to have a happy, meaningful life.

    I'm so glad Debbie could make you tollhouse cookies --- Yum -- I love them warm!

    Thank you for sharing yourself and your wonderful, funny and heartfelt stories with us.

    Something you don't know about me? I am a complete and total technological nimcompoop -- which is why I haven't figured out how to post in some way other than, "anonymous."

    Love and Hugs,
    Sabrina.

    P.S. Love your new Pinterest Board!!!

    ReplyDelete
  57. HELLO!!!THANK GOD, HERE YOU ARE !!! BRAVE!!! GO ON FIGHTING!!!
    Happy Christmas to you and your family and dear friend Linda (ehr... Debbie, sorry). Finally there must be a God somewhere, despite all the evil in the world.
    From Murcia, Spain, Millions of kisses and hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  58. I too have just gotten myself a Google account so that I can tell you how very relieve I am that you are back! I look for your blogs every day and absolutely love reading them. You are such a joy to so many people!! Wishing you and your family all the best for a wonderful Christmas. Donna - Australia

    ReplyDelete
  59. I too have just gotten myself a Google account so that I can tell you how very relieve I am that you are back! I look for your blogs every day and absolutely love reading them. You are such a joy to so many people!! Wishing you and your family all the best for a wonderful Christmas. Donna - Australia

    ReplyDelete
  60. Thank God for you. And your friend. We love you Ellie xxx

    ReplyDelete
  61. So so so very glad you're back girl, but very sorry you had to go through all of that to get here.

    My Mother always told me that if I had one true friend in my life I'd be very lucky. I think Debbie is that friend to you, and yes, you're one very lucky girl! I've never been to St. Louis, but obviously they make some great people there!

    Looking forward to tomorrow and the future with you!

    Love and hugs,

    xoxox Janice

    ReplyDelete
  62. Was so excited to see your post tonight. Am only new to reading your blog and you''l be glad to know I was very loyal and didn't read anyone else's while you were off the air. Debbie sounds amazing - love the matching pjs. With such horrible things happening around the world and in my own country we definitely need more Debbies and Ellies in the world. Michelle - Melbourne, Australia

    ReplyDelete
  63. You have great spirit, great friends, and a beautiful life! Thank you for sharing and glad you are back.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Thank you for today's post! You have so many of us praying and thinking positive thoughts just for you to get better! Amazing! You are a blessing for all of your readers.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Ellie. What is it about you? You touch my heart and clearly everyone else who reads your posts. Its like we know you intimately. I wish I were living in Paris and that I could do my bit to be there for you. You really are very special. And I am so grateful you remain with us and God willing, will do so for quite some time to come xxx

    ReplyDelete
  66. Was so worried. Checking and waiting every day for you to come back,

    ReplyDelete
  67. ...what they said 👆
    I spit my coffee at "You're still here?" You are one of a kind, so inspirational, and yes, you and Debbie were meant to meet that day.

    ReplyDelete
  68. For the last two weeks I have been checking two sites obsessively. Your site...hoping to see a post from you and Net-a-Porter... hoping those damn Choo boots went on sale. Soooo glad to see your post, soooo glad you have a friend like Debbie/Linda, soooo glad David makes a mean Apple tart. I don't really care about the boots.well, that's a lie. I did check N-A-P just after I read your post. Having been very ill 7 years ago, I know about the strength of prayers from strangers. A little village in Bosnia was fasting and praying for me and I know it worked. Thank you for posting. Thank you for reminding us that every day is, in fact, a gift.
    Sending love from Pittsburgh,
    Robbi

    ReplyDelete
  69. Ellie, my husband is asking if I have lost it! We were supposed to leave 20 minutes ago and he is pacing the hall. I explained to him that I have been worried all week about this girl in Paris and I MUST read her blog and MUST know she is OK before I leave the house.... I have spent every day since your last blog looking for a tree - I live in New Delhi, India, Christmas trees are not abundant here. Finally found one today, but clearly to late for the contest. I just had to get a tree, in the hope it would the pictures would cheer you up - Thank God your back!

    ReplyDelete
  70. Just had a great time lolling around in your Christmas pinterest board! So happy to hear that you are feeling better and I wish you the merriest of Christmases. What a blessing to have a true friend.

    ReplyDelete
  71. So happy you are back and feeling better Ellie! I told everyone at my women's group about you!

    ReplyDelete
  72. What a wonderful friend. You share an amazing zest for life. I am so glad that you are feeling better, what a horrible time you had. Merry Christmas.
    Based on your post about Annency a while back, I traveled there and fell madly in love with it. Simply perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  73. Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting!!! Been waiting and praying and waiting and praying, etc.... So happy to finally read this. I so recognized the stress and emotion and the f-u's you described because I have dealt with life-threatening illness, too, and have come to realize that it is "normal" for that kind of emotion to pour out all over the place!... Please stay strong, beautiful Lady, and I continue to pray for strength and comfort for you. Lots of love xxoo

    ReplyDelete
  74. Ellie, so thrilled to open my e-mail this morning and see that there is a post from you!!! How wonderful that God sent Debbie to help you get through this difficult time!!! Our thoughts and prayers continue with you. Louise

    ReplyDelete
  75. I am so glad you are feeling better. Friends like Debbie are rare treasures and you certainly deserve to have at least one (although a team of "Debbies" might be handy). I have been enjoying your blog for a relatively short time and I am captivated by your "voice". You write in a genuine, authentic way and I wish I could meet you in person.

    You have no idea (well maybe you do) how much joy you bring to me and your other followers (like a cult?)

    I hope you have a wonderful, joy-filled holiday surrounded by your family and friends.

    ReplyDelete
  76. I thought about showing up too. Didn't think of the matching leopard pj's though. I changed my mind thinking you wouldn't want me crawling in bed with you without having met me before... So thrilled to hear from you Ellie.
    Alejandra.

    ReplyDelete
  77. Seeing you in my inbox made my day. It is hard to keep a good woman down. Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  78. Ellie,
    So glad that you are better! You and Debbie both deserve keys to Cities! She is really a true friend/soul sister. We all need friends like Debbie. Friends like that are hard to come by. Thank goodness it was in your destiny to meet that day. Sometimes the best friends made are the ones made later in life. I wish I had a magic wand to wave over you both to heal you.
    Oh and I think David needs a key also, apple tarts and wine are a wonderful combination.
    Merry Christmas!
    Dee Ann
    Kansas


    ReplyDelete
  79. All of us out in your connected universe are at the end of the bed, trying to be helpful and not get in the way, or mess up the covers. We are just there with you and this wonderful family you have introduced to us. We will continue to be there for all of you. Just sitting. With maybe an occasional snarky comment about the tree. All best for the holidays. To everyone. oxo

    ReplyDelete
  80. Thank the Lord! I have checked every day for a word that you are on the mend. The team that helped you through this are truly wonderful. I have family that have MS and I know how hard it is for them to take on big challenges, Debbie is one strong angel. I am always puzzled how someone can be cruel to you online, perhaps they are suffering from mental illness? The prayers for your health won't stop and hope this is the start of a wonderful Christmas for you and your loved ones (even the crabby one)!

    ReplyDelete
  81. Hi Ellie,Oh my gosh you really kill me. Your humor is... well you'd fir right in here! We have a saying in our fam "Sarcasm is just part of our service". So many hard laughs from you coupled with a tear streaked face.You are one in a million.

    Your favorite gifts list from I don't know when...the ploar bear, the aga , the book(which prompted me to jot this line to you),People I want to Punch In The Face, that was classic...like leopard print!

    You really make my day here in sunny Arizona!This post today is Pultitzer worthy. Linda Debbi is amazing. See, amazing peeps get amazing friends. That's how it works. xo

    ReplyDelete
  82. I've been checking in every day to see if you were okay and am very thankful to read that you are! And yes; I do believe Debbie is an angel that was put in the café that day. Seriously! I'm from near Springfield. Am wondering if you knew any of my good friends from there - the Cloptons, Tarrasch's, I knew of Menchetti's. No, I have never met you but am so happy for you that you're feeling better and I so so enjoy your writing. Happy holidays!

    ReplyDelete
  83. Sooo happy you're back and feeling better! I felt a loss immediately without your writing. I look forward to what you have to say! I pray that you continue to get stronger. I have a candle lit for you on my garden altar of Mary. Continue to get better so you can enjoy the holidays with Grace and David and all your wonderful friends!! Prayers and hugs!!

    ReplyDelete
  84. Doing the happy dance for you! Have a wonderful, very Merry Christmas. Sending love from Louise B.,Florida, USA.

    ReplyDelete
  85. Thank you Debbie. We were so worried.

    ReplyDelete
  86. I'm so blessed to have read this post. Joyful that you are better. Grateful for all of my friends. And praying a bit more fervently for you and this world. Thank you so much for inspiring me to grasp the moment. And laugh. Sending love and prayers. Mary

    ReplyDelete
  87. Ellie, I just want to echo all the comments above. I've been worried about you and am so glad you're back among us. Linda/Debbie is the true friend all of us hope to find at least once in our lives. It's snowing in Santa Fe - we always need the moisture - and I'm thinking of you celebrating Christmas in Paris. My love to you.

    ReplyDelete
  88. As post number 91 my eloquence will be lost and my sentiments shared in so many lovely posts above. Your humor, grace and liberal use of my favorite swear word has lifted me today!
    I am glad we are able to lift you in return dear Ellie with our prayers and hope!
    Merry Christamas to all!

    ReplyDelete
  89. This reader is so glad you made it through such a trying week. Your hysterical, sensitive and thoughtful voice has much more to say and share with the world! Wishing you a peaceful and beautiful Christmas.

    ReplyDelete
  90. Such good news to hear that you are doing better!! I will continue to keep you in my prayers. And bless angel Debbie for her true friendship. Take good care now and always.

    ReplyDelete
  91. Is there an echo in here? All of the above comments are pinging from all over just for you. You are so loved and I share everyone's relief at your being better, as well as the appreciation of the amazing Debbie Owens. I'm so sorry you had such misery, and hope things get much better so you can have a joyful time now with your loving family. Wishing you many blessings at Christmas.

    ReplyDelete
  92. Dearest Ellie,
    I hope you know you have made everyone of your readers a better person by your example of how to live. Christmas will be just that more meaningful this year because you breathe the air.
    Wishing you, Gracie and David the merriest Christmas! XO Susan

    ReplyDelete
  93. WHEW!!!!!! This has been very stressful for us, your public, as you can see. Christmas without you or your blog would have been a real bummer. DON"T DO IT AGAIN!! We're all wanting to help and will do anything to keep you here and blogging. SO glad you're back!!! Stick around for a while. Love & prayers, Lindy, NYC

    ReplyDelete
  94. I found your blog through the Gardener's Cottage blog and have been checking daily to see how you are doing. Thank you for sharing your story. Seeing your journey puts things into perspective - you are an inspiration! AND - I've totally embraced my potty mouth now after reading your blog :) Blessings to you and yours during the Christmas season.

    ReplyDelete
  95. Ellie, you are blessed. With wit and courage. With David. With your Gracie. With Paris. And, in having a best friend like Debbie. So damned blessed. I envy you all of it except for your fucking ALS. My best friend and I went to Paris together to celebrate 40 years of friendship, we met when we were ten and I was the new girl in school and she threatened to beat me up. At sixteen she stole my first boyfriend and though I wouldn't speak to her for weeks, I eventually relented. Even then I realized that men could come and go but best friends are forever. We went to Paris to celebrate our fortieth anniversary of friendship. We had the most incredible time...left our husbands at home since husbands are pussies and always want to go back to the hotel. We later found out that the Parisians thought we were gauche and possibly lunatics since we would burst out, pee your pants laughing on the boulevards. We had no decorum. So, I was blessed to have had a best friend for 54 years until losing her two years ago. I think of her everyday and especially yesterday, the 16th. her birthday. I wish she were still here so we could talk about your recovery. She would get it, she got me and she would have adored you. So very touched to hear from you today. xo

    ReplyDelete
  96. Yes! Yes! Yes! Keys to the city all around! So happy to hear you're doing better. It takes a special talent to make the reader (me) laugh out loud while describing such a harrowing two weeks! Blessings, love, peace, Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  97. Whew...so happy you're better...prayers answered!!! OMG...loved the you-tube link...

    Merry Christmas!!!

    Renee from Northern California

    ReplyDelete
  98. Ellie, I don't know you and you don't know me. But I wondered more than once these last few weeks where you had disappeared to. You've captured my heart and I'm so glad you are better. You're lucky to have Debbie...we all need a Debbie!...and she's lucky to have you. Merry Christmas to both of you.

    ReplyDelete
  99. So Pleased I can stop worrying - just fucked up my days worrying about you. But I was sure you'd make it, "cause tough people survive - just go see who is still alive in the nursing homes - not the sweet ones, that's for sure. Seriously, I never pray, but I prayed for you. God probably thought who is this person? I haven't heard from her in 40 years. I guess he paid attention, because you are back. Keep on shouting and screaming and kicking - it is the only way to survive ALS

    ReplyDelete
  100. Dear Ellie, so so very happy you are feeling better! Thank you for coming back to us! Love, hugs, and holiday greetings from NYC. All the best, Susan

    ReplyDelete
  101. Oh I am so happy to read this blog today! I've been thinking about you since your last post and seeing as I'm a worry-wort, I added you to my worry list ;) Glad to see you're coming back around. And yes, you are very blessed to have a Linda/Debbie in your life. What a wonderful friend she is and, by the same token, you just have to be a wonderful friend to her and for her to have someone be by your side for 9 days! You are both blessed. Poor David....not sure who's got the harder time of putting up with who. Such a hoot. And, in all seriousness, it's wonderful to see you back on this blog and this made my day a 2nd time. (first time was I became a grandma for the 2nd time this morning....) Life is good when we allow it to be...

    ReplyDelete
  102. I threw out a reading on mindfulness today, & asked my co-readers to read this instead. You've got it, girl, and I love you for sharing it! Thank you from the bottom of MY heart.

    ReplyDelete
  103. Another voice to say Welcome Back! I was relieved and delighted to read your post today.
    With all my best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
  104. WOO HOO you're back and fighting life again! You've been missed, and all the while thoughts and prayers were sent your way. Go Debbie (Linda) girl, yes you deserve the key to the city! Keep fighting the fight and telling David to shut up where needed. Love and hugs as always are sent your way. Suzana from Australia xxx

    ReplyDelete
  105. You are our gift who keeps on giving. Thank God!!
    Nina

    ReplyDelete
  106. Dearest Ellie,
    so happy you're feeling better. What a true and beautiful friend Debbie is,I'm so happy you had her and David with you to help you through the last two weeks. Wishing you a very merry Christmas enjoying all that goes with this special time of year. All my love,Katrina xxx

    ReplyDelete
  107. I am so excited to see you today, visiting everyday reading all the love from the troops out here….key to the city and a long stay perhaps at Hotel Le Bristol, Paris, ;-)))) I am so touched with your having the love and support from Debbie…aww, Joyeux Noel to both of you! XOXO

    ReplyDelete
  108. Count me at the end of the bed smoothing covers, etc. But I'm a terrible nurse so perhaps I could straighten tinsel. Such a relief to see a post from you, only checked a thousand times. Love that you're better, and love Debbie (Linda.) I also love your husband who can bake and take care of you!

    ReplyDelete
  109. YEA! I am so happy you are on the mend. I thought about you several times every day, hoping to see this exact post from you. And what a friend you have... a true christmas gift.

    And apologies for not sending a tree photo - I just couldn't bring myself to send it until I knew you were better. This is the first year I've loved our tree... why? Well, I decided to buy my kids their own tree to hang all of our (their) ugly ornaments and put (hide!) it in their room. Is that terrible? I don't really care though because they love their tree and now I get to love my tree. We all win.

    I wish you the best holiday with your darling family and look forward to reading your inspirational, aspirational, funny, heart wrenching, witty, truthful and insightful thoughts.

    Lots of love from SB! Xx

    ReplyDelete
  110. You are a light unto the world. Debbie truly knows how to be "the shelter of each other". What a pair!

    ReplyDelete
  111. Ellie, welcome back! So very happy that you are feeling much better.

    Amelia xxxx

    ReplyDelete
  112. if I didn't love your blog enough, I adore you for calling out Terry Richardson as a creep. I had to unfollow someone I really liked on instagram for posting a picture with him. Ghastly predator.

    ReplyDelete