Bad: Parisian cafés apparently have a hard time with the
concept of ice. If you order a drink, you will get no ice. If you “rudely” ask
for ice, you are going to get two miniscule cubes that melt within seconds.
Hate this.
Good: Parisian gardens are not for drug dealers. Parisian gardens
are for mothers with their children, elderly people, chic hobos, dogs, workers
on a break from their jobs, lovers, rich people relaxing and families. I never
feel like I have to “watch my back” in Parisian gardens. And everyone throws
away their trash. Love this.Bad: I don’t like when Paris tries to Americanize itself. I don’t like seeing Starbucks, food trucks, juice bars or Chipotle in Paris. I do, however, go to every one of those examples on a weekly basis. Hate this.
Good: Museums are crowded. Why is this good? It’s good
because it proves that culture, art and history are still respected and
appreciated in Paris. I should also point out that crowds do not bother me at
museums, because I get in first and free. First and free! Thank you ALS. Love
this.
Bad: There is no Target, J.Crew, Whole Foods, Home Depot or
Staples in Paris. Sometimes you just want to go to one shop for everything.
There is an IKEA by the airport, but who goes to IKEA? (I do.) I want to choose to go to a boutique, not be forced to. Hate this.
Good: Gas station food. Swear to God, my husband actually
looks forward to his “favorite carrot salad” at the gas station. French gas
stations have toubouli salad, ham and cheese baguettes, café au lait, fresh
croissants, gâteau au chocolat and fruit. Love this.
Bad: Gas station food. One time my husband was running into
a French gas station and he asked me what I wanted. My response was, “A cherry
Slurpie, nachos and a sweaty hot dog.” The look he gave me was priceless.
Unfortunately, you’re not going to get any of that deliciousness in French gas
stations. They don’t even have Doritos! How am I supposed to enjoy my road trip
to Normandy without my Cool Ranch Doritos? Hate this.
Good: Parisian men dress well. Even Parisian teenagers. No
one wears jeans so low that you can see their privates. No flip-flops. No
baseball hats. No golf shirts. No printed tees. No tank tops. No gold chains.
No board shorts. Parisian men seem to make an effort here… An effort all on
their own. Fitted trousers, baby blue button-down shirts, scarves, respectable
shoes, colorful blazers, chic shades, cool hair, no socks or colorful socks,
suits and ties. Love this.
Bad: Everything is closed on Sundays. What the f*ck! Hate
this.Good: Everything is closed on Sundays. Parisians definitely enjoy their Sundays. Take Luxemburg Garden for example… Children are sailing their little boats in the pond, families are having a picnic on the lawn, the tennis courts are used, teenagers are making out and smoking cigarettes politely, boule is played with wine in hand, children’s playgrounds are packed, ice cream cones are licked, books are read leisurely in a perfect green garden chair, strolls are taken hand-in-hand, and the pace of Paris slows. Parisians even enjoy their Sundays in the winter…They just add hot chocolate. Love this.
Bad: I hate when French people take an American word and try
to make it French. For example, le shopping, le week-end, le picnic, le
jogging, le smoking. Hate this.
Good: No one tries to rush you out of a café. You can sit at
a Parisian café nursing a cappuccino for four hours smoking 900 cigarettes if you want to. Love this.
Yes, I read all of those books… in a month and a half (except three of them I read later). Clearly,
I had a lot of time on my hands…on account of my retirement (hint: ALS). They
are all utterly entertaining and give you an unabashedly true slice of life in
Paris. Guess what? You can purchase all of them in my Have Some Decorum Bookstore HERE.
Merci, Paris for a beautiful and interesting first year.
A toute!
Hi Ellie, I discovered your blog a few months ago through Habitually Chic and wanted to let you know how much I am enjoying reading your witty and forthright posts. Love your take on living in Paris!
ReplyDeleteDear Daphne,
DeleteSo glad you like the blog. Thank you for your kind words. Heather from Habitually Chic and I just did the day together. Love her. Hope you're having a great day. XO Ellie
Started my day with a migraine and a good laugh, thanks! For the laugh that is, not the migraine;)
ReplyDeleteDear Brenda,
Deleteyou're welcome for the laugh… Not the migraine. :-)
Hope you're having a great day.
Ellie
Love this! You are such a funny and gifted writer!
ReplyDeleteOMG u are F@CKING FUNNY! just discovered ur blog from Habitually Chic and u are now my new found funny love...there's nothing more funny than a good looking well mannered gal that uses fowl language to get her point across...juss sayin!
ReplyDeletePierre
Had to laugh......after living just outside of Paris for four years......everything you say is true....except I found Cool Ranch Doritos at Carrefour......
ReplyDeleteI would add "Paris to the Moon" by Adam Gopnik to this list. :)
ReplyDeleteIs there really a Chipolte in Paris? *crazy jealous even though we are having roasted lamb and endive for lunch*
Don't think I was reading your blog yet when this was published. Glad for your links to previous posts at the bottom of the page. One thing that drove me crazy when I lived in Paris is that you can't return anything. Period. I remember trying to return a child's top to DPAM. I had bought 2 of the same tops in different colors. One had been worn and washed (according to the care label) and it shrank down to Barbie doll sized. I took both back and argued that it was no longer wearable. I could have been talking to the wall - the salesperson wasn't going to take it back no matter what. I had a few other situations, but finally realized it was pointless.
ReplyDeleteThe closest store that I found that kind of equated to a Target is the Auchun at La Defense. Metro Line 1 to the end. Do you take the Metro? Spacious and well stocked - pretty sure it is open on Sundays, too.
I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you make this website yourself or did you hire
ReplyDeletesomeone to do it for you? Plz reply as I'm looking to create my own blog and would like to find
out where u got this from. cheers